Starving Your Golden Calf

The other day  I was scrolling through Youtube looking for something to watch, and a thumbnail for the “Ten Commandments” came up. Remember it? It’s that classic with Charlton Heston…my sisters and I used to watch that every Easter when we were growing up…has nothing to do with Jesus - but it was broadcasted every Easter…

For whatever reason, the movie popped into my head today and I started thinking about the whole situation with the Golden Calf...

This is that part of the movie where Moses has left to go up the mountain to hear from God. But while he’s gone the Israelites, the newly released slaves, get impatient and want a god they can see - so they throw in all of their gold and force Aaron, Moses’ brother, to make this golden calf - this idol.

Now every time I saw that part growing up I thought - how stupid is that? Why would you make something with your own hands and then worship it, Talk to it, pray to it…like it can help you or save you in anyway? I could never understand that…

And as I was thinking about that Holy Spirit reminded me that these people were newly released slaves. The Israelites had been slaves for 400 hundred years and all they knew was the pagan beliefs and idolatry of Egypt. So when the going got tough for them in Moses’ absence (someone they could see and touch), here comes that old behavior…sound familiar?

He reminded me that’s it’s the oldest problem when it comes to a relationship with God because you don’t usually experience Him through your physical senses…it requires an Inner sensitivity that takes time to develop. And in that time that it takes to build that inner sensitivity you will relapse into your old trust patterns.

So living by Faith is the most challenging pursuit most of us will ever experience…to believe that something is true, that we can stake our lives on, without physical evidence…

The Root of Idols

And I could definitely see that in myself. As I started working on the wounds and  weeds in my own soul, here come all of those old patterns of behavior and expectations that I’d held onto for decades…the pessimism, the negativity, the sarcasm, poverty mentality…all of those thought patterns were well-worn roads in my soul. 

So much so that pursuing a life of the Kingdom, of faith, attempting to believe God over the current circumstances of my Soul and my life was nearly impossible.

My trust and expectations were deeply rooted in what I had experienced; in what I could see, touch, hear, taste, smell.

So when it came to money, to actually or having healthy relationships in my life - it just seemed like one big pipe dream. I felt like I had no training, nothing in my life experience that would actually help me see the Promises of God come to pass in my life. I had nothing to “hang on to”…

Because seeing the promises of God come to pass requires that shift from sight to Faith, from seen to Unseen. And I had to discover that inner anchor of trust in God that could outweigh anything else.

Trusting in the Lord with all your heart

Is a big one. It’s trust in God beyond the news or the economy or all the craziness in the world…and it’s a huge hurdle for all of us.

Because trust and fear don’t go together, and there’s now a basic fear in life; an ongoing, low-grade anxiety that has created the most medicated generation we’ve ever seen here in the US.

And from that place of fear and anxiety - of impatience, the ongoing need for immediate gratification…here come the idols. But they don’t come at you directly, they just slip in through the cracks of disappointment and impatience and fear. 

The idols provide what your immaturity and ego want: a shortcut, relief…it gives your flesh, your sight, something to cling to. 

And then before you know it you’re reading horoscopes, watching porn and buying scratch-offs - looking for some form of immediate gratification that will make you feel like you’re making progress or have some idea of what’s coming  in your life…Continuing in a desperate attempt to feel safe and in control. 

And a relationship with God doesn’t work that way. 

He requires us to trust and obey, even when it doesn’t make sense. I’ve learned that trust is just basic when it comes to following Jesus, but you may as well have asked me to roller-skate uphill- backwards.

Where’s your calf?

Now, you may not have a huge golden calf in your living room, but what do you instinctively run to when you’re stressed out? Is it a who or a what? Do you really trust in God with all your heart, or do you trust in your bank balance with all your heart? Or your doctor? Or tarot cards?

This is a tough one because God’s standard, Jesus’ standard, is that we would have no other gods before him…meaning no other person or thing that we bow to or rely on before him….

So when I looked at my own life and became completely honest with myself, I could see some real idolatry. It wasn’t a substance or a person, but when it came to money I could see it. It ran my life. 

I can look back and see the emotional rollercoaster I was on with money…how I felt when I had what I thought was enough, and how I felt when the balance was not what I thought was enough. Happy or sad..up and down. Confident to fearful -Paycheck to paycheck…

And this is where money specifically is so tricky because in the world we live in, you  need money. No doubt about it. You need it to live - you almost need it to breathe. 

You need it for shelter, clothing, food, transportation, healthcare, childcare, to heat and cool your home, for your phone…there is so very little in this world that doesn’t require you to pay to participate…and that can really begin to pollute your relationship with God.

Two Masters

Jesus tells us in Matthew 6:24 that you can’t serve two masters…that either you’ll hate one and love the other, or hold to one and despise the other; that you can’t serve God and Mammon.

Some translations change that to money, but Mammon and money are not the same thing…although the implications are similar.

Money is simply a form of exchange, it’s a tool…but it does magnify the heart of the holder. Money is a magnifier. And once people have it, you can see what’s important to them; it reveals what they treasure.

Mammon, however, is a spirit of lusting for money; of greed, pride; but also financial fear. Financial fear? That really got my attention.

I mean how many times had I said either out loud or in my thoughts that “my life would be so much better if I just had more money?”…more times than I can count. 

And as I continue to learn about the realm of the spirit, those thoughts had actually been a kind of worship to that spirit of Mammon.

To make matters even worse, when I would whine or complain about prices, when what I had never felt like enough, when I would give out of habit, but not out of heart…when I had a constant low-grade anxiety, a fear around money - that was actually me “serving” Mammon.

When Holy Spirit showed me this - it really scared me. I had never made the  connection between my stress and fear and that being a form of service or worship. 

I had to get it together…the more I thought about Jesus and His sacrifice for me, the more resolved I felt.

So that was my idol…money. But we all have one somewhere. Maybe it’s your work,

politics, education…I mean you can fill in the blank. 

All we’ve been taught in this world is how to manage our lives with man-made principles or systems that we can physically interact with. It’s called living by sight.

We trust in clinical trials and statistics and the stock market and medicine. Man-made structures that are far below the potential of God - but they satisfy our sight and our intellect.

And again, this is why living by Faith, by God first, is so challenging. God doesn’t fit into a test tube. He’s not going lower who He is to fit into our small understanding. 

Intimacy with God requires that we humble ourselves, draw near to Him, reach up and begin the transformation of the renewing of our Minds- to know His perfect will for us.

So how do we do that? How do we reach up to God daily?

Transitioning Your Trust

As always, when it comes change -and in this case, to identifying the idols in your life, and beginning to shift your trust to God, begins with being honest with yourself.

I recommend starting with your morning devotional. And don’t be ashamed to bring this to God - I mean He already knows anyway. This is you getting to know you better.

Think about your life and what I call the Five Quadrants: Relationships, Health, Fitness, Finances and Faith.

Do a heart check on this. Simply ask- Lord, where do I have idols in my life? And be ready to listen and write. 

We all initially have something we trust first before God; everything from medicine to money…

Or  what you run to may be a priest, or pastor or some other religious figure. It seems like the right thing to do - but just be real and stay open to what Holy Spirit reveals to you. 

And I will say here  idolatry has a way of hanging out around denominational thought and religious traditions. Jesus Himself said “with their lips they worship me, but their hearts are far from me.” (Matt.15:8-9)

Jesus also said that anyone who loves their mother or father more than Him, or loves their children more than Him is not worthy of Him. (Matt. 10:37) 

So having our Trust in check, having our emotional priorities in the right order is extremely important to having an intimate relationship with God.

Next Journal it out, track it. Understand what and who you trust when the pressure is on. Family, medicine, politics, religion, money?

We live in a world where idolatry is normal and completely socially acceptable. The enemy doesn’t care what you value first as long as it isn’t your relationship with God! So being able to see and transition out of the old, cultural  pattern is going to take some time.

This is where evening or bedtime journaling is so key. I’m a believer in reviewing my day with God, and it’s a place in our relationship where I’m working to be more consistent. My mornings are solid, but bedtime can sometimes just get overlooked from drowsiness.

So take a moment and just ask Holy Spirit how you did. Review your day…the morning, midday, lunch, how were things in your commute, traffic. How did you manage your focus? Was it on the news, or office politics? 

Meditation, praise and worship, gratitude

As you begin to recognize where you go for your answers, and what systems you trust, you’ll begin to identify any idols. The best part is that as you transition from unknowingly worshipping the idols, you can begin to intentionally worship God.

This is where gratitude comes in. Seeing every meal, shower, hug, prayer…every aspect of your life as a gift from God…this is a major form of worship for me. 

Then of course there is praise and worship and getting intentional of creating that atmosphere for God throughout your day. Remembering who He is increases the joy factor and gives you even more to be grateful for.

Lastly here is meditation. I have the Bible app and they always text a verse of the day. You can use that as a standby thought for the day, or find your own during morning devotion. Setting your mind with a default scripture is a huge way to keep your Soul Aligned with God throughout the day…ensuring that He’s bigger than any man-made system.

Identifying and starving any idols takes time. But it is absolutely necessary to please God and continue to grow in the Love, Power and Purpose He has for your life.